Friday, April 06, 2007

Induhviduals quotes

From the Dilbert newsletter:

INDUHVIDUAL QUOTES

Thanks to the observant readers of the Dilbert Newsletter, here are more True Quotes from the people who put the duh in Induhvidual:

"Do you think I've been sitting here twiddling my arse?"

"At no time do I ever condone you making changes to improve things in the office."

"Snakes on a Plane - what's that about?"

"Go jump off a lake."

"He's not the sharpest canister in the ocean."

"Keep a stiff upper chin."

"The squeaky wheel gets the spoke."

"I can lead you to horsewater, but I can't make you drink."

"He'd give you the arm off his back."

Announcement in store: "We have a customer by the balls in toys needing assistance." (It repeats.)

"You play ball with me, and I'll scratch yours."

"It's half of one, six dozen of another..."

"We do not have a smoking cow at this point."

"Is there 264 days in the year? Or is it 265?"

"My daughter is as smart as a tack."

"I've got a higher IQ than your little pinky finger."

"If Dad were here right now, he'd be rolling over in his grave."

"Well, it may be the wrong tool for the job, but it is the right tool for the business."

"It's our golden goose. We better figure out how to make her purr."

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

"We do not have a smoking cow at this point."

She quit "cold turkey" lol, she "kicked" the habit.........too funny! Sounds like Duh Bush talking. Moron Bush that is. Oil-George!

Anonymous said...

And it's Sun-and-Wind-Merkel.
Get ready for the new model country (EU).

Need I translate this into Fahrenheit yes?

Duh!!

(This message is meant for the B administration)

Anonymous said...

Before the 1975 war, a Lebanese guy started making and selling "beef and lark patties". A friend of his tasted them, and was puzzled:
"Are you sure you got the recipe right?
- Yeah, sure. Why?
- Well, I can't quite feel the taste of the lark.
- It's equal parts, beef and lark.
- Equal parts? Really?
- Absolutely. One beef for one lark. Saves me a lot of money, too!"