Friday, March 16, 2007

Puddings and proof

I am teaching myself to stop judging, but I will allow myself to rub a pet peeve: when people will use a phrase wrongly, and not notice that it does not make any sense.

Example: "My dad literally exploded when he heard it."
... That's not what "literally" means. It is very rare for human beings to literally explode.

Example: "I could care less."
What they mean is "I couldn't care less". Which has meaning, unlike the first one.

Example: "The proof is in the pudding."
What, the murder weapon is hidden in the dessert? The phrase is "the proof of the pudding is in the eating", which makes sense.

OK, I'll try to relax now. :)

PS: A good place for language on the web is the e-mag Word Detective.

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

A pet peeve, how... creative!

I only have a common pet cat.

BTW, do you often stroke your peeve? It might encourage it to come back and follow you. ;o)

Anonymous said...

Pascal, I think he must be talking about Peewee Thurman. He just didn't get the spelling right.

The pet part I don't understand.

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Try not to talk about it. Attention feeds it, and it'll never leave me.

Anonymous said...

Anybody seen Harry Potter? I have a water balloon filled with ink for him.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Eolake, I could care less about your blog. Litterally! :-D

Caring more, now that would be a challenge.

Cliff Prince said...

Other silly puddings ... some of my more comlpicated favorites:

1. "By enlarge", a typical internettism for "by and large", a phrase that means roughly "nearby, or at large" and therefore "in general".

2. "When worst comes to worst", a stupidopsis for "when worse comes to worst", a phrase whose obvious logic should make it nearly impossible to get wrong.

3. "For all intensive purposes", a moronolepsy that stands in the place of "for all intents and purposes", another phrase with an obvious meaning.

4. "Just between you and I", a grammatical idiotism which uses the nominative where (as object of the preposition "between") only an accusative will do.

5. "He looks just as you", a limp-brained aneurism in which "as" takes the place of the correct "like", unless you mean "he looks around the room in a manner that is just the same as the manner in which you cast your eyes about the room" instead of the more common "his appearance is similar to yours".

Now, some of my more simplecated favorites:

tung instead of tongue
waste instead of waist
hairlip instead of hare lip (really a rude term for a cleft palate)
hairbrained instead of harebrained (a very useful term for a cleft intellect)

But, I disagree about the pudding. The proof IS in the pudding. That's what the current expression is. It means, roughly, "the proof of whether or not we've got the preparations right, is something we cannot determine until all is complete, at which point we will eat the pudding to see if it tastes good." In other words, the proof is in the pudding. Eating it will get it back out again. The proof isn't in eating the pudding, that implies that the act of determining whether or not it's right will determine whether or not it's right -- a logical tautology only Dick Cheney could figure out.

Finally, the worst (coming from worse) of the lot:

Have your cake and eat it too.

By golly, how on EARTH would you EVER eat your cake, if you didn't have it first? I mean, you've GOT to have your cake in order to eat it, right? If, say, Edward over there has your cake, and you don't, then you've got to go get your cake away from Edward before you can even consider eating it. If he's greedy and won't let you have it, then you can't eat it, obviously (and he will get a serious talking-to from his mum when your mum phones her up after school). But if he lets you have it, then you can eat it. So, you can indeed have your cake and eat it. You have to.

Anonymous said...

I really hate that I can't mock youngsters with bad language habits on IRC or Usenet (for example) - they pick up my exaggerations and use them themselves a few months later!

Anonymous said...

OK, I'll try to relax now. :)

you need to relax. people aren't going to change their language or expressions to accommodate anyone.
sorry charlie.
ps harry potter movies suck.

Anonymous said...

I only have a common pet cat.

We catch cats where we live and keep them caged for days before we drop them off in the country then we rejoice that those flea-carrying felines are out of our neighborhood.
We detest these worthless animals. They are gross and reek of stench.
If we could we would make it a law to destroy all cats in the world. Wipe them completely out.
We dream of a cat-free world!
We won't tell you what we do with the ones caught going through our garbage.

Anonymous said...

Quoth the final identity:

"Finally, the worst (coming from worse) of the lot:

Have your cake and eat it too.

By golly, how on EARTH would you EVER eat your cake, if you didn't have it first? I mean, you've GOT to have your cake in order to eat it, right?"

That one puzzled me, too, until it was explained to me that "have" means (in this context) to continue to have it. To keep it.

If you eat it, you no longer have it. Its gone.

Got it?

laurie said...

final identity, that was hilarious.

re. having our cake and eating it too, jeff said what I wanted to say. The dilemma is ontological You want to KNOW the cake (not the biblical sense), be in absolute possession of that cake forever, and simultaneously pork out with pleasure til kingdom come. Especially if it's chocolate.

I'm getting hungry.

Anonymous said...

This page has three instances of it's, all used correctly, and one instance of its which is, sadly, used incorrectly. Its gone should be It's gone.

This, by the standards of the Internet, is pretty good; many pages seem to get these words muddled more than half the time.

It's got to the point now that when I'm reading I'll swap the meanings of these words and, if they turn out to have been used correctly, I then have to go back and re-read the sentence to make sense of it. This is something about which I have a peeve, as you can, perhaps, tell.

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Right. Like "sight" and "site". They are probably reversed as often as not, and sometimes by good writers. I've done it too.

Anonymous said...

I'm getting hungry.

I've got some cat stew.....lol.
I'll even throw in some pepper and cheese to spice it up ;)

On the puddings and proof post, nuttin will ever change this coz ppl r ppl who dunce care.
We live in lazyland.

laurie said...

anonymous, it's interesting. Henry Miller would have loved your writing style. The phrase "cat stew" would have made him laugh with pleasure. In fact, your writing often reminds me of him. He turned his nose at nothing.

Laurie

Anonymous said...

Final Identity,
Could you please hold that thought until I get my dictionary? I'll be right back with my book-mobile. :-)

Oh, BTW, hare lip and cleft palate aren't identical. They refer to a similar birth defect, but concerning respectively the lip and the palate. They may be associated, or not.
I once was an assistant to a plastic surgery operation aiming to fix a baby's cleft lip. The feeling when you see the final result, of a fully normal and expressive human mouth, was beyond words. The baby was the same person, but now her facial expressions were as spontaneously expressive to an outside observer as yours and mine. She could communicate with her face at last. Dang, it felt good! Today, this girl must have grown up into a teenager, and she can SMILE. :-)))

"a logical tautology only Dick Cheney could figure out."
Gee, you sure have unusual acquaintances! ;o)
I knew I had heard that style before.

I Killed The Muse said...
"harry potter movies suck."


I'm sorry, can't argue with you on this topic. I'm a Harry Potter nut, so my view cannot be objective. You could be dead right (or is that "dead to rights"?) and still I'd never see it.

Rats Rule Forever said...
"We detest these worthless animals. They are gross and reek of stench."


Well, cats were first domesticated when ancient Egyptians noticed that Nature had provided a perfect remedy to the bane of prolific rodents ransacking their grain stocks, causing famins and spreading diseases. They were so impressed that this historically advanced civilization divinized cats. Think what you like but they're vitally useful. As I've said before, all creatures have their role in Creation.
"If the Rat weighed 40 more pounds, Man would be the master of the world no more." -- Albert Einstein
Apart from that, cats are no more "gross" than any other animal, including dogs, rats, birds, rabbits... It's very subjective! And a cat that's NOT forced to go through garbage to eat and survive will actually have no smell to mention. But human activity and environmental impact reduces their choices.
Finally, if you advocate cruelty to animals, any kind of needless cruelty, to any animal, I don't envy you nor wish to meet you. Just ponder this : can you be 100% sure you won't be reincarnated into a mistreated animal as many times as you yourself harmed one? The Almighty certainly has the power to do this to you. Imagination is the basis of empathy, you know...
Many domestic animals are very clever, more faithful in their affection than humans, and on occasion have saved their human masters' life. He who has no friends is a sorry soul.
"The more I learn about humans, the more I like my dog." -- George Bernard Shaw
You may very well be trying to upset me by talking that way of creatures I like. Well, have your immature fun. I know there are lots of mean things going on in the world. In Lebanon, hundreds of people got treated the way you prey on animals. Or worse! These eyes have seen more than they needed to.
Walk in the footsteps of Marquis Donatien Alphonse François de Sade if such is your inclination. I'm not in a position to hold you accountable. Someone else will take care of it at the end of your natural life, after you've freely been good or evil. It's YOUR karma, buddy.

I have nothing against mice and rats. I find them captivating and quite intelligent. Even though their interest goes straight against ours in case of cohabitation, they're part of the balance of Nature. And a cat hunting them is too. If you want to blame somebody because you like rats, go complain to God.
Me, I detest nothing and nobody, Mr RRF. I have better things to do with my life than waste it on hatred. Suit yourself, you're a human, so you have freedom of choice.

Hangar,
Even though English is only my third language, I feel right with you there. An occasional typo is one thing. But massacring one's language, the support of ideas, leads to muddling one's thinking proces. "Know what I'm saying?"
Heck, I once saw a black dude on the Jerry Springer Show (not the best of places to be!), who said "Know what I'm saying?" every other sentence. Honestly. What a waste of effort! Especially that, precisely, I couldn't always know what he was saying, because he was lousy at formulating thoughts. "Know what I'm saying?" sounded more like an SOS, like "tell me, did I manage to convey my thoughts in a reasonably understandable way?"
.
"Ghetto talk" sounds pleasantly folkloric in rap music, but in daily life it's the symptom of intellectual poverty. A poverty that's becoming rampant in great parts of society today. "Problem neighborhoods" in France have the exact same problem. Muddled talk turns them into a social prison, turning exclusion into a vicious circle.

"A mind is a terrible thing to waste."

Anonymous,
Hey, I remember your creative orthograph. So, you dropped the monicker "ward cleaver", after inventing the very original expression "cats are knats" on February 9th?

Anonymous said...

Kooky.
You've got some style, Pascal.
And quite some breath, I sayeth.
Reminds me of the time I exposed Ray Finkle's hidden gender.
[Sucks in a huge breath of air:]
Soccer style kicker, graduated from Collier high June 1976, Stetson University honors graduate class of 1980, holds 2 NCAA division 1 records one for most points in a season, one for distance, former nickname "The Mule", the first and only pro athlete to come out of Collier County, and one hell of a model American.
[Phew!]
All-righty then, anybody wants to "ass" the Ace a question? Anything... "bugging" you? Just let it off! A hart on your heart? Ants in your pants? A cat on your hat? A hare over your hair? A jackass in... well, you get the point!

Anonymous said...

I don't envy you nor wish to meet you. Just ponder this : can you be 100% sure you won't be reincarnated into a mistreated animal as many times as you yourself harmed one? The Almighty certainly has the power to do this to you. Imagination is the basis of empathy, you know...

Don't flatter yourself, this has nothing to do with you personally.
I don't wish to meet you either. Ponder that. Reincarnation is a LIE. Imagination IS NOT empathy. Read the dictionary. You confuse sympathy with empathy.
Love your worthless cats because every one you stroke will be another one in my land that will meet it's fate. And truthfully, I hate rats too.
You're that guy that said he wouldn't pull the wings off a fly right? Well, I've done so for many years and enjoy seeing them grounded. It's more amusing than seeing their blood smeared agaisn't a white wall.
Have you ever seen a close up picture of a fly? Man, they are sick looking and ugly. Especially those dreaded green flies that sound like jet planes flying overhead. Pity the poor horses that endure their constant attacks.
Take a bow Rat Man! Thank you, thank you. I just did. Don't throw flowers either because I detest bees as well. ;)

Anonymous said...

Hey, Anon buddy, I have you to thank for reminding me about this one. I owe you big time for this.

My late grandfather was a prisoner of war in Germany during WW2. Conditions were pretty tough. You know that bit about cat stew? Well, Grandpa actually had to eat some, when food became really scarce. Really. His impression, in a few words : "Absolutely vile. I hope I never have to taste it again."

So there you have it : the opinion of a reluctant connoisseur.

While we're on the topic of gourmet food, there's a population in India, from one of the lower casts, that specializes in hunting rats. When a farmer has rat infestation in his fields, he gives them a call. And doesn't have to pay them, either. Why? Well, what they do is, they locate the rats, dig out their burrows, catch them, and all the grain stored there by the rats goes to the hunters as a prize, which usually amounts to quite an interesting quantity. This is how they eat. As for their catch, well, remember these rodents are fed on 100% natural grain. Very healthy. And they represent a precious protein source for the growing children. Roasted on a wooden fire. Looks quite tasty, apparently, judging by their happy faces. Certainly better than urban rodents bred over the garbage of humans.
And in Africa, when they get locust swarms, they avoid famin by eating the buggers, a tooth for a tooth! Very popular dish, in fact. It's called Kamalouboumbe Balls. New cuisine may adopt it some day.

I have quite an epic memory of a rat encounter once, very similar to the legend of Saint George. I promise I'll tell you all about it some day. Lives were saved, other were ruined. Ah, what a day for a knight, and what a night for a dame!

As a last note, it seems Pixar is about to release this summer a CGI movie called "Ratatouille" [rat-ah-tooey], about a gourmet rat living in Paris, disgusted by the nutritional habits of his trashy family, and who's about to get into big trouble by trying to snack on the fine cheese trolley of a prestigious restaurant.

"Zee proof ees een zee cheese. Ah-ha! You see? I told you zere was a rat! Get heem, espèce d'imbécile!"

Anonymous said...

RRF,

"Cause toujours, tu m'intéresses."
Translation : "Keep talking, I'm SO interested."

You're such a meanie, I bet you even moderate your blog!!! :-P

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Come on, that's a low blow. Call somebody a drug pusher or a kiddie molester, that's all part of the game, but to say he *moderates his blog*!? Beyond the pale of good manners everywhere.

Anonymous said...

Another one I've just come across for the nth time: "tow the line" instead of "toe".

Anonymous said...

Hangar,

I would make a pun about how it depends what kind of line and use one's talking about, but I'm still traumatized by that close up picture of a fly floating before my eyes. Or is that a picture of a float, flying before my "I"s?

Oh well, better go and dot my tease before I cross the line and start lyin' through my "T"s.

Anonymous said...

Use of pet peeve is not that uncommon:

xkcd

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Pet peeve in wikipedia.

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

(Continuing my last comment) ... I added the last line: "The "pet" part indicates, semi-ironically, an attachment to the peeve. Something you "love to hate"."

Anonymous said...

My own pet peeve is people who never upset me. I so hate being denied the pleasure to gripe!