Sunday, December 11, 2011

A nuts story

Sandra visited New York many years ago, and went to see a show called "Witness the great Schnabel demonstrate his masculinity". The show consisted amongst other things of Schnabel, an exceptionally well-equipped man, crushing three walnuts, whacking them with his manhood.

Sandra did not come back to the Big Apple until forty years later, and to her surprise there was a fresh poster of the great Schnabel. She went again, and Schnabel, now a bit lined and grey, performed his acts, only this time he used coconuts instead of walnuts.
Sandra had to know, so she went backstage to ask him why the change. "Well," Schnabel said, "the ol' eyesight is not what it has been, you know."

8 comments:

Ron Preedy said...

Pne of my favourites, though when telling it verbally, so to speak, I usually spin it out much longer ...

Thanks for reminding me of it :-)

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Yes, it did occur to me that this was one which was very flexible in length. Though my dislike for taxing my readers' patience and my own keyboard kept it brief. :-)

Mikhail P said...

I know the humor dies in explanation, but I'm feeling a little thick: I read this this morning and was befuddled. So I read it twice more. The next day I still don't understand it at all.

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

I'm not sure if explaining is s good idea either. But what the heck. I think the humor comes from the idea that crushing walnuts with your dingdong would be quite amazing, and coconuts would make you Superman, but this guy upgrades to coconuts just because he can't see the little walnuts anymore.

TC [Girl] said...

Eolake said...
"...dingdong..."

Would that, technically, be called his PENIS (the men reading this wince! Sorry! It is what it is! :-), then, Eo, 'cuz...for someone who might just be checking in, from another country, and a little challenged with ALL the idioms of this crazy language, neither "manhood," nor "dingdong" much helps to give the person much of an indication as to what the HELL "whacking [walnuts] with his manhood" means! :-D

Perhaps, now, this person might be able to put it all together! I wish you luck in getting the joke, Mikhail P! :-D

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

""whacking [walnuts] with his manhood" means"

That's an update, and a bit clearer than "without hands", I hope. At least I think it should be clear enough to anybody with anything but a driven-snow white mind. :-)

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Oh, also I find these waffling language plays to be much more funny than just saying "with his dick" or whatnot.

TC [Girl] said...

Eolake said...
"That's an update, and a bit clearer than "without hands", I hope. At least I think it should be clear enough to anybody with anything but a driven-snow white mind." :-)

ROFLMAO! YES! VERY GOOD of you to clarify that, here and now! That helps get the visual, um, straight, as well! LOL! :-D

"Oh, also I find these waffling language plays to be much more funny than just saying "with his dick" or whatnot."

EXACTLY...as are YOU w/the 'Dingdong' shit! ROFLMAO! OK...now, I've had my stomach crunch routine done for me in that HILARITY! Thanks! :-P