Why do so many people suck at acknowledging/answering e-mails? It's a huge percentage of people and companies that you never get an answer from.
Just one small example is DPReview.com. And they know it, they just now wrote on their new blog:
"Firstly, and surprisingly for some of you I'm sure, we don't only welcome your feedback, we do read it and we often act on it. What's important to remember here is that our editorial team here consists of a handful of people with full-time jobs producing content (as well as forum moderation), and this means that we simply can't answer every email we get, nor can we acknowledge every bit of feedback. But that doesn't mean it hasn't been read (and if necessary, acted upon)."
What I want to know is, if something is important enough that you want to act upon it, isn't it important enough to send a reply to?
A few very busy people can do it, like David Pogue and others. Me too, I have a web site with 80.000 visitors daily, so I get a lot of mail, and yet I manage to reply to virtually everything people might reasonably expect an answer to, and I don't use a lot of time on it. If it's simply a nice comment they have sent, I have a macro which sends back a "thank you". That macro is one keystroke, it takes not even one full second to do that.
So why is it that something like half the people or companies I write to with nice comments or questions, I never hear from? They can't use a single second to tell me that I've been heard?
If somebody comes up to you in the street and asks for the time, you wouldn't dream of completely ignoring the person. Nobody does, I've never seen it. And if it did, the other person would probably be really offended. Is e-mail really that abstract for so many people that to them it's a completely different situation?
22 comments:
Most people our age aren't very computer savvy...unless their jobs require it. In fact, I find most people our age are rather annoyed with dealings with computers. Unless they go into computer programming, they would not know about setting up a macro key.
And...everyone has different personal standards regarding e-mail *ettiquette* and such. Some, like yourself, are aware of such *formalities* and make a conscious effort to reply to all e-mails, personally. Others have no clue how to manage it. Others don't even give it much of a thought.
I have, however, read -- on at least 2 occasions, now -- of your *frustration*(?) with this issue and wonder if there might not be a few ways to solve it...at least in your own mind?
1) crank out your *frustration* in the form of an informational article on this very issue: give some ideas of what you believe should be proper e-mail ettiquette, stating your thoughts on *why*. Share how easy it is to create a macro. I'm sure you'd be *educating* someone...and possibly even making them more aware of the issue, and possibly even more efficient in their own businesses and lives from the information.
2) accept that: as it is not possible to force friendships/collaborations with others, so goes it with personal standards. They are just that: *personal.* We can't force our own standards on any other person or their business. You could, of course, set up a standard letter and send it out to businesses that you get *annoyed* with, on this particular subject...stating why it annoys you. If they learn something from your article and put it into practice, perhaps it might be helpful in inproving their customer relations...and thereby sales. You just never know.
3) Perhaps you are *grappling* with how to manage the issue on a business/personal level, yourself, and...I have some ideas but...of course...they are only my own...of whatever *caliber* you would deem them...but...here some are:
the decision to either set up a blog -- on DOMAI -- where you would *reply to the masses* w/just general blogs covering issues that others e-mail to you? I dunno. You wrote about your 80K traffic but...that doesn't account for what type of e-mails your 200 *incoming* are, on a daily basis. Could some of those be set up completely automated? The ones where the *girlie* pix come in? Do those need a personal note? I don't know; I'm just *putting it out there* for you to ponder.
And, perhaps, after that, maybe things might be more manageable for you?
You have some good points there.
On the latter ones:
Yes, I guess it's a personal standard. It just seems irrational to me to have standards which differ *that* much between face-to-face and e-mail.
I bring up my own mail volume not because it's a problem for me, but exactly because it's *not* a problem for me.
As one who's e-mailed you a lot, I must say that I find your macro to be one very polite and well-mannered keystroke. ;-)
"Yes, I guess it's a personal standard. It just seems irrational to me to have standards which differ *that* much between face-to-face and e-mail."
Eolake...
I guess I should have said *standards* AND...*preferences*...like where we ALL *exert* our efforts; what's important to us, personally.
E-mail vs. face-to-face:
some prefer face-to-face and HATE e-mail. They find e-mail exchanges to be cold; impersonal (no matter how much of an effort to convey something, it is just *flat* to them); intimidating; overwhelming ("awk...look how MANY e-mails I have, today!!" Usually...this would be a comment an exasperated employee would make...at the constant *barrage* of a gazillion demands on their time and day at work.)
Most people would prefer face-to-face but...there are others that really love their e-mail.
Some people are really good @ communicating -- via e-mail -- but...very shy in person.
And...then there are the efforts; priorities; and a time factor that are put forth in a business...
Perhaps some business owners just don't *get* how they come across...because they are too busy running their businesses and not doing a whole lotta e-mailing with other businesses. They pick up the phone and call them; they are busy and in a hurry... And...if a business owner is rushing around...staying very busy...sending out e-mails might not be a priority that they have given much thought to...unless you send them an article or letter. ;-)
That or...just plain old *acceptance* of everyone's varied styles of running their businesses or...(gasp) looking for a vendor (etc.) that suits your expectations of what customer service looks like to you. :-)
And...also: we cannot put the *template* (if you will) of our own expectations of ourselves onto other people because that just leads to disappointment.
OK...I think I'd better quit, now. I might be passing Pascal up for the longest comment on your blog...today, anyway! ;-) lol! (just *playing* w/you, Monsieur Pascal! ;-)
Only for today, and if you're lucky. He has posted some ten times as long.
Sure, I'm working on my personal peace with How Things Are here too.
E-mail, cold? Surely you have got that wrong, e-mail is *cool*, not cold! :-)
Very valuable points, everyone. Taking the issue of e-mails to the personal side, there is something different in them, although I cannot for the love of myself get what is that difference. I have very loving and caring friends who do not respond to or simple acknowledge my emails, and when I have sometimes pointed out that this annoys me intensely, I have been ironically given the answer: “Oh, I forgot you are one of those people who actually responds to emails”. I’ve learned to live with it…
I had the hobby of pen-palling (is that a word?) for many years. Me and my pen-pals were absolute maniacs about it. We used to complain about how expensive it was getting, we resented the long time it took sometimes to communicate something that you were just dying for your friend to know. In those days before the internet we would have given our left arms for something half as magical as emailing. Inexplicably, and way beyond the obvious reasons of how we lost all the “romanticism” of the classical ways, email completely destroyed communication among us. It baffles me, I’ll never understand it.
I just forget I have email, or rather I assume nobody could have possible emailed me. In addition I'm never sure if folks want a return email, for example every now and again Mr. Stobblehouse himself sends a lil' note... I read it and visit the site, never sure if I'm supposed to say thanks or not.
For example how long does this chain reaction last:
A: Blah, blah, blah....
B: Thanks for that "blah"...
A: You're welcome
B: No Problem
A: Agreed
B: So we're good?
A: Yep
B: Cool...
etc.....
Good point. Though in practice it does not seem to be a problem. It's a judgement call.
You forget you have email!?? Holy frig, I don't forget for an hour. Interesting.
"Eolake said...
E-mail, cold? Surely you have got that wrong, e-mail is *cool*, not cold! :-)"
I agree. I personally LOVE e-mail!! It's the *highlight(s)* of my day, alot of days!! It's essentially equivalent to getting a card in the mail (how long ago that already seems! lol!) *back in the day* of *snail mail*. :-)
I was just stating that *some* people tend to think of it as such.
and...
"Neutralday said...
I just forget I have email, or rather I assume nobody could have possible emailed me."
and...(lol!)
"Eolake said...
You forget you have email!?? Holy frig, I don't forget for an hour. Interesting."
I have to agree with Eolake: Call me an e-mail *addict* but...there aren't too many...um...minutes in the day that I'm either not thinking about checking my e-mail or...checking my e-mail (or replying to an e-mail! lol!)...to see who might have sent one. It's a big shot of *happy* throughout the day...and night! lol! :-)
TTL: *playing*, or playing? ;-)
I'll remind you I hold this blog's record for the briefest non-empty post ever. If I recall, the text was:
" ? "
I may also hold the record for longest post. But that latter one took me a bit wore work...
I'm not picking up the challenge right now. Busy week, prostatic electricity period, AND lightning storms intimidating my modem.
"Sorry, can't stay and chat! Gotta go. Things to do, people to kill..." -- (The Joker)
Mary,
I'll see your friends, and raise you five. ;-)
My best friend will send me long postcards by snail mail, but seldom writes "over the ether waves". I long decided there was no point in trying to go figure. That figure's too far, and besides, it's uphill. ;-)
"I had the hobby of pen-palling (is that a word?)"
It is NOW! :-)
Neutralday :
Nice example of chain mail there. ;-)
(Yes, you can acknowledge that. You're welcome. De nada. Come again. My pleasure. Yeah, sure. Um... okay then. Bye. See ya. You too. You three. Say hi to the parents. Be well. Right, it IS splendid weather. How's your cat? A-hem. Sooo, uh......)
Eolake measured the time...
"You forget you have email!?? Holy frig, I don't forget for an hour."
You should try sleeping. You know, on occasions. I heard it can be fun.
"Pascal said...
TTL: *playing*, or playing? ;-)"
Sniff, sniff...Monsieur Pascal called me "ttl". I have yet to be recognized. :-( ...
Yes, PLEASE, Pascal!! Stay off the *ether*-Net (and computer!)...so you don't chance of it getting fried by any lightening bolts! That would not be good to have you...uh...*left out in the storm*...so to speak! lol! ;0)
P.S. - I like to use the asterisks as my *quotation-marks-made-in-the-air* kinda quote symbols! lol! And...I attempted to communicate that I wasn't actually inferring to where your mind probably just went by bringing that...um...point back up! lol!
*playing w/you* only meant: *hamming it up*/*goofing around* (nope...I just seem to be digging a bigger...um...hole, here, trying to explain myself; ain't I?! lmao! ;-) "I was just joking around with you." Yeah! That's it! That's what I was trying to say! :-)
I feel your pain Eolake
I sent out 50+ emails recently with my new home phone number, all to personal contacts/friends/family. I got one response "thanks for letting me know" or something like that.
I wasn't expecting much but..
TC, please don't use asterisks as quotation marks. They ain't. And they're meant, in email, to mean emphasis, a very different thing. It's very different to say
I'm "angry"
and:
I'm *angry*
---
Neutralday:
If everybody responded every time to my mass emails, I'd be overwhelmed. But there are people on my lists where I haven't heard a reply for years, and that's sad.
Anon, to be honest I may not myself respond to just an address change. Perhaps if it had included a note and some news.
But if I send out one of my very occasional notes about new art I've made, I'd like something better than a 1% response rate, seeing that I only send to people I consider friends of some stripe.
Cold not cool.
Pre e-mail I had several pen pals. We would invest the time in composing a letter. It would be full, and cover many threads.
With e-mails those correspondences decayed into a once in a while one liner.
Maybe us all growing up, getting families and careers made us slow down. Life after getting settled is not the shared adventure of early adult life.
Still, an acknowledgement is a good thing. I have had some good ones in the past. Still, I agree with Pascal, your automated response is polite.
"Thanks for the tip, I'll take a look.
Love, Eolake"
Hah. I made that one mainly so I'd have a reply *before* I looked at the web link I'd been sent. In case I didn't care for whatever it was, it would be harder to be positive.
Actually, I think there are a couple of variations. I'll have to keep an eye on that one ;-)
"Eolake says...
I'm *angry*"
I can tell! lol! ;-) At least you didn't tell me that you are *mad*...'cuz that just about drives me...well...*crazy*! lol!
Thanks for that tip! I'll keep it in mind.
Don't cry, TC. It's not you, it's me, I swear. In fact, I think you're Totally Cool.
Been quite tired lately, don't always have a clear mind. Plus, I'm always in a hurry to send my comment before the power dies on me again. (Those blackouts in California a few years ago? They had hired a Lebanese Government engineer!)
As for using the phone lines during a storm... let's just say I read the Calculus Affair.
Life in Lebanon: never a dull moment! [Lebanity item #42]
BTW, who squealed? "The *ether*-Net"? I never revealed to you guys that I like to sniff ether while commenting online!
Um... whoops? "Me just the maid, Sahib. Pascal no here. Bye!"
Eolake specified...
"they're meant, in email, to mean emphasis"
That's *so* true! And *meaningful*. I mean, man, that's *deep*! :o)
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! [Does the monkey hop.] Teacher! Ask ME, ask ME!
I have another Eolake Stobblehouse macro very cool quote :
"Thank you very much."
That, I think, is the "I received your feedback" macro. Not very talkative, but always nice to have dropping by for a visit. So well-behaved! ;-)
Hey, that's odd. There's no "Eolake Stobblehouse macros" page on Wikiquote. You know what? That's *SO* unfair! Many very rude people have their page...
"Pascal said...
Don't cry, TC. It's not you, it's me, I swear. In fact, I think you're Totally Cool."
I won't shed another tear, Pascal...as long as you don't cuss @ me! lol! And...thanks; I like to think that I'm cool, too...once in awhile:-) Just for fun, I used to call myself *Top Cat* ('cuz I'm a LEO!) as a kid! Silly, I know but...I liked it! :-)
You're *totally cool* yourself, Pascal...you Rascal! lol! ;-)
Top Cat is a good nick, you should use it.
"Eolake said...
Top Cat is a good nick, you should use it."
Alrighty, then, Eo...I will! :-) Just don't want anyone thinking that I'm an *Alpha* or anything, though...trying to get a *scrap* on! lol! Thought I'd 'splain where it came from! ;-)
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