"You know you are Lebanese when..."

Pascal (in Lebanon) sent me the text in blue below.
I can't vouch for the veracity, since this kind of culture is so enormously foreign to me.
One thing strikes me though: if this is an even half-way accurate picture of meditaranian/middle eastern culture, then I think people from there, especially men, must have a very hard time when they come and live in a place like my home country Denmark. Because all those status things, like the clothes, the car brands, and the macho image, simply don't mean anything to most Scandinavians. I don't think they even notice it. It must feel like being castrated or becoming invisible to somebody from a culture where it is everything.
- Eolake

You know you are Lebanese when:
1) You constantly mix Arabic, French, and English when speaking ("Okay merci kteer, yallah bye!") or ( Hi Kifak Ca Va )
2) You call a Night Club (Night), Cafetteria (Cafet) and Dunkin'Donuts (Dunkin')
3) You won't drive anything that's not a Mercedes, BMW, or Hummer
4) You could always use another pair of sunglasses
5) You get plastic surgery at least once in your lifetime
6) You use your forehead and eyebrows to point something out
7) You think you are better than everyone just because you are Lebanese
8) You are so "class" while everyone else are "nawar" (Bedouins)
9) Syrians are the butt of all jokes
10) Your family "owns" at least one Sri Lankan servant
11) You can't do anything in life unless you have a "wasta" (connections)
12) You have about 40 cousins
13) You have at least one relative named Mohamed, Ahmad, George, Elie, Tony, or Marc
14) All your aunts want to hook you up with a guy/girl they know
15) Family gatherings are filled with gossiping and cat-fights, where the women hang out in the kitchen and the men sit and discuss politics
16) You are constantly talking about the latest Hayfa Wehbe news
17) You have relatives smuggling diamonds in West Africa
18) You bought your driver's license
19) You don't have a job but you drive an SUV and upgrade your cell phone every month
20) You only buy something if it is expensive enough, because the higher the price the better the quality, right?
21) You dress like you're going clubbing all day everyday, probably because you do.
22) If you are a Lebanese girl you give the look of death to another girl who looks better than you
23) Your aunt is always asking when she can belly dance at your wedding
24) When you arrive at an airport you find like 20 relatives waiting to greet you
25) You always curse Lebanese people when you are in Lebanon, but when you live abroad you only make Lebanese friends
26) The men always fight over who pays the dinner bill (Everybody wants to pay!)
27) You teach Westerners all the Lebanese swear words
28) You have to keep explaining to Westerns that Beirut is not just a drinking game
29) Your refer to other Lebanese guys as "Cuz" or "Bro"
30) Your extended family is over your house all the time, discussing the latest family drama
31) There is no such thing as quiet time
32) You know there is another meaning for "kiss" and "tease" ("p*$$y" and "a$$", in arabic!)
33) At least one conversation a day is about being Lebanese
34) Going to church is a fashion show
35) You have at least one gold chain with a cedar tree or a cross on it
36) You think wearing a leather jacket during the summer is cool
37) You are always right!