"Britons jailed, fined for sex on Dubai beach", article. When cultures clash.
Side note: as if the grammar of paper news publications was not bad enough, news outlets even insist on export the attrocious practices to online publications, even though space is not an issue there. Replacing "and" with a comma reduces redability, makes no sense, and saves only three characters.
I is not used to engrish head lines, but me have to fully agree: it's clearly a news trope, replacing "and" with a comma. When amateurish *I* am in a very lazy mood, I simply use "&" instead. A very pleasant typographic character, designed so you can write it in one fluid hand gesture, like number 8. Guess I'm overqualified for U.S. press, huh?
ReplyDeleteFrench newspapers are far less vernacularly barbaric, I say.
Here are a few genuine news headlines, with ironic commentary. None of it is mine, I just ripped it from some humour site.
Me, I started making the same with spam titles, it breaks the tedious of deleting them. I'll probably blog them some day.
Actual News Headlines :
* After Detour to California Shuttle Returns to Earth [This, of course, confirms what we always suspected about California.]
* Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures [Who would have thought it!]
* Crack Found on Governor's Daughter [Imagine that!]
* Deer Kill 17,328 [Alrightie! It's about time the deer got some payback.]
* Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide [Hmm ... They may be on to something!]
* If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile [You think?!]
* Include Your Children When Baking Cookies [Just make sure you prepare lots of cookie dough.]
* Is There a Ring of Debris Around Uranus? [Not if I wipe thoroughly!]
* Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant [See if that works any better than a fair trial!]
* Lawyer Says Client is Not That Guilty [Now THAT really has to build client confidence...NOT!]
* Legislator Wants Tougher Death Penalty [And tougher than death would be?]
* Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half [YIKES! Chainsaw Massacre all over again! Whatever happened to simple detention?]
* Miners Refuse to Work after Death [No-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!]
* Man Jumps Off Bridge. Neither Jumper nor Body Found [He was wearing a jumper?]
* New Vaccine May Contain Rabies [No thanks, Doc, I'll take my chances without the shot.]
* Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni [At last! Someone has found a use for alumni.]
* Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [What a guy!]
* Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers [Now THAT's taking things a bit far!]
* Publicize Your Business Absolutely Free! Just send $6.00. [To quote Homer Simpson: "DOH!"]
* Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says [No, really? Nothing gets by these folks!]
* War Dims Hope for Peace [I can see where it might have that effect!]
* Woman Improving After Fatal Crash [This should have made headlines all over the world!]
I can see how Dubai's conservatism could become an issue with Western tourists. But really! I mean, public drunkenness? Topless sunbathing? Sex on the beach? Can those tourists even do that in their OWN country? And is there any westerner that still hasn't heard about Arabs being "a little prude"? Even a TV-news recluse like Eolake would know better than try to recruit photo models in the Gulf! But no, you still see some morons who want to travel to other countries to behave like they probably wouldn't dare at home, and then complain about getting their asses xenophobiated (xenophobiased?). And then people will say that the arrogance of Americans abroad is a false stereotype. All legends have some truth behind them...
Not that French tourists are necessarily better! Just saying that, like in all things, Americans feel they *have* to be #1. ;-)
No wonder we here in Lebanon are becoming less welcoming towards tourists...
Interesting comment, doctor! Those headlines made me laughter hahaha ;-)
ReplyDeleteThere are different sets of tourists: the explorers, who are interested in other cultures, the fun lovers, and the "in-this-country-we-do-what-we-can't-do-at-home " doers.
As we say in German, they just release the hog.
"Can those tourists even do that in their OWN country?"
ReplyDeleteFair point.
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Yes, those headlines will make you laughter hahaha.
Ya, to quote Schwarzenegger : "Kood kleine little choke, ach, ach, ach! Das ist Cherman humour, ya?"
ReplyDelete(Ah, those classic shakespearian actors do have a way mit vords.)
But who let the hogs out? By Belenos?
I can definitely understand young Arabs letting loose when they travel to the far more liberal West (and they definitely do). The opposite? More puzzling to me, it being.
Incidentally, another article about the incident mentioned this : «Miss Palmer said she and Acors were "just kissing and hugging".» It's not at all unlikely that some Emiratis, just like some Republicans, only saw what their excessively innocent minds EXPECTED to see. I mean, actual SEX on a Gulf beach? That's a bit stretching it. Uhm... no weiner pun intended!!!
A relative of mine works in the maintenance of commercial airliners, and as such sees a lot of exotic countries. A few years ago, he was sent to Congo. He and his colleagues were given a very careful briefing about not flaring up local mentalities. One valuable piece of advice I remember and share with you: if you're a White man in sub-saharian Africa, do not, I repeat, do not go around with short sleeves, like a T-shirt. No matter how terrible the heat may get, just... don't, okay? And whatever you do, never EVER get topless where someone might see you. Again, I'm talking about you MEN.
From what I understand, for some reason it has the same effect on locals as shaking a red rag in front of a water buffalo's murky eyes. But that's just my own interpretation...
Other helpful foreign tips: as a proper guest, do not discuss local political topics in a country you're visiting, like the linguistic conflict in Belgium, the autonomy claims of Quebec in Canada, of the Basques in Spain, of the Corsicans in their island OR the mainland... Otherwise put: don't get yourself into sensitive issues. There is no such thing as human rights problems in China, slavery in Sudan, terrorist immigrants in Great Britain, racists in Austria, underage sexual tourism in Thailand, war criminals in Serbia, State religious discrimination against Christians in Saudi Arabia, or fanatic political intimidating activists in Lebanon. Move along, people.
And for those of you savages who want to visit beautiful U.S. of A., "In God we Trust", it's written on our shuckin' currency, so better be a good Christian and accept the Salvation of Jesus with every breath He grants you, giddit? Amish. I mean, AMEN.
To put it simply, I'm reminded of an image that was given to the staff at Guantanamo, and which clearly wasn't heard well by some: "Treat the Koran as if you were handling a delicate art piece." So, when travelling abroad, act as if you were in the porcelain museum of Emperor Ming, and your words were sticks and stones. Make no sudden syllables.